What does your faithfull blogger and Liz Lemon have in common?

A mutual love of chic yet affordable handbags!!!





I did some quick research and found that Liz Lemon's character makes would make about $1 million dollars a year.

My salary is just slightly lower, and by slightly I mean I make about a 5th of that (I'm rich beeotches).

So either Liz Lemon is living cheap or I am living waaay above my means.

Happy Monday

Hey peeps. So I KIND of have a lot of work to do today so apologies for the slow updates, but I had to post on this awesome Jezebel piece where the ladies, Jessica and Slut Machine (my hero), pay a visit to American Apparel.

Now for anyone over a size two who has ever been depressed when trying on clothing here you are not alone. The clothing is well made but soooo unflattering on the average woman. Jezebel referred to the clothing as "aggressively unflattering" and also had this amazing headline for the post: "American Apparel Will Make You Look Like A Fat Hooker" (very true). Check out the video HERE.

Now I don't want to jump on the anti American Apparel bandwagon but unless you are shopping for t-shirts, hoodies or cardigans I strongly caution against shopping here. Before you pick up that spandex jersey dress think of what Tim Gunn would say. Think of all the flattering fabrics, colors and cuts that COMPLEMENT your lady lumps and put down that leotard and take your ass you Zara.


P.S. Dear Gawker Media, can you PLEASE make your videos easily embeddable?

Bravo!!

Wednesday night is reality TV night in my household and last night Bravo did not disappoint with a new episode of the always fabulous "Project Runway" and the new series "Make Me a SuperModel."


Let's get to the recaps:

Last night's Project Runway challenge asked the designers to create garments out of materials found at the Hersey's store in Times Square. The Heresy's product placement and incessant commercials were a little out of control even for Bravo, but overall it was a pretty good episode here are the highlights:

Tim waking up the contestants at 6AM : There is nothing worse than millions of people seeing what you look like first thing in the morning. Poor Kit with the crazy bed head and no bra, and was Kevin naked because the camera did not pan down past his waist. Also I really wish we had been given a close up of Christian to see what that hair looks like in the morning. I mean does it stick up at even crazier angles, does it fall flat, does he sleep with maybe curlers and a doo rag? I guess the world will never know.

Chris as the stereotypical fat dude : Yes Chris is a big guy but does he really have to do things like fall asleep and snore loudly with his mouth open and behind the scenes during the judge's deliberations did he have to scarf down candy bars?

The designs : I have to give the designers props for turning out really well made creative garments out of candy materials. I really loved Rami's piece. Incredibly creative and detailed and he deserved to win the challenge. I predict him as this year's winner.

Tim Gunn : Tim had THE best line of this night where he looked at Sweet Pea's garment and said (imagine Tim's voice) "What is this a skirt? It looks like a coffee filter or a maxi pad." Oh I fall in love with him more and more each week.



Last night Bravo also premiered the new series "Make Me a Supermodel"which I thoroughly enjoyed. It's a mix of America's Next Top Model and American Idol but better because there is no Tyra (sorry Ty Ty I'm a little pissed at you for rigging this season's competition), there were legit industry experts involved in the judging process and Tyson Beckford is one the co-hosts and he is smoking hot. Nikki Tyler was the other co-host but her face looked kinda weird and bloated. Here are my faves out of the models that we were introduced to:

Holly:
I loved her. Really beautiful, fierce walk (God am I really saying FIERCE?) and great Polaroids. As long as she doesn't fuck up completely she should have this competition in the bag.



Jacki:
This is a really horrible photo of her. I have no idea why these promotional pics made her look like a drag queen but she has lots of potential and Tyson was totally eye fucking her the entire episode.



Frankie:
Completely obnoxious but one of the most beautiful men I have seen in a long time. Is the real life version of Derek Zoolander with a Latin accent.




Ben:
Last but not least I love Ben because he is a small town sheriff who showed up to the audition with scars and bite marks from dealing with local drunks and meth freaks.



I'll probably watch this show every week and MAYBE actually go online to vote for my favorites. Who were yours?

Open Letter To The Entertainment Industry

Stop trying to convince us that Hillary Swank is beautiful. It's not working.

He's back....

You may remember Andre J. from last week's "It Girl" post. For some reason I have always assumed that Andre would have a crazy deep Barry White voice. Oh was I wrong.

I wonder where he gets his hair done? He weave game could put many people to shame (Beyonce take note)






Update: Seems like Beyonce was inspired by a certain someone at Saturday's Movies Rock Event.

ANTM

Rich over at Four Four finally has his top model recap up. I'm betting that Chantal or Bianca goes home this week. Check it out here.

Here is my favorite screen grab.I laughed my ass off when Lisa came out with this hair. She looks insane. Tyra you know you are wrong.

Beauty Behind The Scenes

I admit to being a girly girl and as a part of that I make regular appointments to the spa where I am tweezed, waxed and pumiced into the well groomed version of femininity that is expected of a cosmopolitan 20-something.

While at the spa and salon I am often presented with the following thoughts.

1. Why the hell am I spending my hard earned dollars on this? Can I just get some Nair or a home waxing kit and do this myself?
2. Didn't I read a recent exposé somewhere on how unsanitary these places actually are?
3. I wonder what it's like for these women to work day in and day out with the feet, armpits and lady flowers of strangers?

This week's New York Magazine cover story takes a really interesting look at that last point, with a behind the scenes look at how class and cultures collide in the beauty service industry.

You can find the full story here.




Update: The more I look at this cover the kinkier it becomes. I think Tarantino would approve.